Thursday, January 9, 2014

8 and Counting.



 Multifamily Living with the Williasons
I have been referring to our current living situation as “Cohabitation” I looked further into the definition of the word and would like you to know that we are not “Cohabitating” the way it is defined. I should have used the word multifamily living not “Cohabitation”. I sleep with my husband, Sam sleeps with her husband we do not share husbands…eww! 

Question 1: What led you guys to that choice?

Our decision to move in together had a lot to do with my husband Jordan’s military career. The National Guard drills once a month, and two weeks out of the year. With the way things are going a deployment seems to be in our future. When and if Jordan deploys he will be gone up to a year. I knew that I didn’t want to live by myself while he is deployed so we made plans to move in together. It also seemed more sensible we are renting a six bedroom home cheaper than us renting apartments separately.
Question 2: Do you share kitchen responsibilities? 

We try and do a clean up after yourself rule but sometimes it doesn’t work. We are pretty adult about the whole situation because we know we aren’t purposely leaving messes for the other person to clean up, most of the time for me at least I totally forget I have left something out. Sometimes I clean the whole kitchen sometimes Sam, Josh or Jordan clean the whole kitchen. However when one of us is cleaning the kitchen it isn’t like the other people are sitting on their butts doing nothing, together we have 4 kids under 2 someone needs to entertain the kids while one or two of us attempt to clean. We do clean together, and we try to keep the messes in the kitchen to a minimum because toddlers can push chairs and whatever is left on the counter is free game. 

Question 3: Do you ever feel like one family does more than another?

I feel like in any situation there are going to be moments where you feel you are doing more than the other people in your job, school groups, and home. There are certain chores some people like and some people don’t like. Josh and I end up doing the dishes most of the time because we really don’t mind it. Sam sweeps a ton…again with 4 under 2 we need to be sweeping constantly. The biggest thing we need to remember about multifamily living is we are going to have moments where we are upset because we feel like the other family is being lazy not contributing enough to the household chores and we need to talk about it. With multifamily living you can’t burry things under the rug it will only get worse and you have the risk of destroying a relationship you don’t want to lose.

Open communication is essential to multifamily living if you can’t communicate between families you will have issues no doubt about it. You also want to make sure you are communicating between each other and not an outside source. Your home is your business and you don’t want things getting blown out of proportion or misconstrued. Family council is going to happen because you are a great big family living together that’s going to have problems and you will need to resolve them. You have to be comfortable enough to say “The cupboards in the kitchen are being left open and I keep hitting my head in the middle of the night when I go to get a drink.” Then the people leaving the cupboards open (Alex because she is 5’3” and doesn’t realize they could hit a taller person in the head…and maybe she was being lazy.) will realize what they are doing and make sure they shut the cupboards.  




I love multifamily living the benefits are amazing, especially when you have a husband who works a lot. I have countless examples of the good things about it here are just a few.

Christmas time this year was crazy I wasn’t able to go shopping until the Saturday before Christmas with my toddler and newborn in toe. When I got home both kids were definitely ready for naps and I had my arms full as I tried to figure out the best way to unload kids, groceries, and presents. Then out the door comes Josh asking what I need help with I give him the kids he takes them into Sam and then continues to help me unload the car. Could you imagine if I was still living in a second story apartment by myself…

Sam and I both suffer from migraines there have been several times that we have been able to go lay down for an hour or two while the other person watches and entertains the kids. Another thing that we wouldn’t be able to do if we lived separately.

Dinner is quite an experience with 3 who are eating food and love to experience it with all their senses…lol literally we have pulled some things out of noses and ears before…mainly Braden’s. However at the end of the meal when it is time to clean up with four adults one or two can tackle the baths and the others can clean up the chaos in the dining room! 



We have made some of the coolest memories and it has only been two months. It has been an adjustment but we are all enjoying it. We have common areas we all hang out in such as the living, dining, kitchen, and playroom. We also have our private areas we can retreat to if we are feeling overwhelmed and need a sensory break. All the living bills are cut in half! We go on family walks together and the looks on people’s faces when we tell them we are sisters and live together is priceless…lol add in we are Mormon and you get a look of complete shock. I seriously want to tell people we are sister wives just because their facial expressions crack me up. And I am sure they get even more confused when the kids call Josh “Daddy Josh” and Jordan “Daddy Chaka”. It’s hard to explain but it’s us.

Our living situation helps us both out. But I don’t think Sam and Josh know how wonderful it has been for us. Drill weekends are really hard on Braden and I have seen over the past couple months them become easier because Braden has “Daddy Josh” and his best friend Colden to help distract him while Jordan is gone. That has been really helpful and easier on my heart to see some of the pain of Jordan being gone erased from our lives.
Toddlers are hilarious and if we weren’t living together we would miss out on Colden and Braden conversations such as.
C: Daddy is Josh
B: Daddy Chaka
C: No Braden Daddy Josh
B: Daddy Chaka
This conversation was on repeat for a good ten minutes. 



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