Happy Christmas Harry!

Merry Christmas from the Eliason Family!

 I thought about sending out Christmas Cards and then I was like "mmm...betta not". So instead enjoy this lovely Christmasy blogpost about our family and all we have been up to! I will do it in chronological order! 

Jordan...

 My sweet amazing husband has been deployed since June of this year. It has definitely been a learning experience for all of us. Jordan worked at sears up until his deployment. Shortly after he deployed he was promoted woohoo! He really enjoys being in the guard, and has resigned for another 6 years. We were lucky enough to go visit him in Texas along with his parents and we had a spectacular time. I truly have been blessed with amazing in-laws. I can't wait to have my husband home, and I am counting down the days to the so far non-existent coming home date. Here are some photos from our trip! 

Alex...

It is safe to say I am still weird as ever! I am still quirky and enjoy my embarrassing sense of humor. I however have made some life changing decisions this past year. One I finally decided on a major and I am super excited about it. I am majoring in Psychology and I can't wait to be out there helping people. I am back at school, and have survived the first term of the year. I couldn't have done it without the help of my supportive family, and Christ. I am trying my best to handle this deployment. It has been really difficult for me to be without Jordan. I have faced mountains, and more mountains. I know though I have only gotten to the other side because the savior was there leading me. I made the decision that it was time to quit taking my anxiety/depression medication because I felt confident enough I could handle my life without medical intervention. I have come to learn that what I feel while taking the medication is a lot different then how I feel not taking the medication. It has been intense and overwhelming but in the end I know I will feel so much better. It was really exciting to go to Texas and visit Jordan, it was my first time to Texas...everything really is bigger in Texas. Slowly but surely this deployment is going by. I am sorry so much of my writing is based on the deployment and emotions of it but seriously it is a huge part of our lives right now. Next year I am sure we will have more exciting news.

Braden...

 Braden turned 2 this year! He is officially potty trained during the days (still working on the nights). He is a ball full of energy sometimes positive, and sometimes not so positive. We are working on pushing and hitting but out of the biting phase (thank goodness). He really enjoyed his first airplane ride to see his Dad. He loves talking and introducing himself to people today at church he said this "Hello my name is Braden, I live with my mom at my house."
He can be crazy, and make me want to pull my hair out but he is sweet and caring as well. The other day I broke down in front of him and he just hugged me and said "I love you mommy." I know the deployment is hard on him, and randomly he will say "I miss daddy." but for the most part he gets through each day better than I do. If you ask him where his daddy is he will tell you "My daddy is in Afghanistan."
His vocabulary is large, and sometimes I am blown away by the conversations we have. I forget that he is a 2 year old. He makes me laugh, and brings light to my darker days.


He is really into the Ninja Turtles right now and if you ask him what his favorite color is he will reply "Mikey" his favorite song is also "Mikey". He loves One Direction especially Harry Styles(Thanks to my little sister Jordan Danae). His actually favorite songs include: What does the Fox Say(he knows all the words), I'm sexy and I know it(I know I am a terrible person but he loves it), and any One Direction song. He actually has memorized a lot of lyrics and when I am randomly belting out songs he chimes in(which isn't always a good thing) The other day I was singing "I got to stay high all the time..." and he finished with "To keep you off my mind ooooooooaaaoooooo"
He keeps me on my toes, and is a great reminder for me to be a better person. He still loves to swim, and has even jumped in the pool a few times. He used to like the slide at Splash until Jordan went too fast with him. He is a very emotional little guy. He also has a really good memory and talks about things I have forgotten. I love him so much.
Braden Quote(talking to my cell phone): Google send me to One Direction.

Blake...

What a year for Blake! He turned 1 in October! He has 8 teeth, he is walking, and starting to sign. His vocabulary is limited as this point he says "Dada" when looking at pictures of Jordan, and he cries for his "Mama" other than that it is pretty much hilarious nonsense. He can sign milk and only cares to sign milk. He is not sleeping through the night and never has! Along with eating pretty much everything he can get his hands on he is still nursing. He has crazy "Gary Bucey" hair Jordan will not allow me to cut until he gets home.
Blake has separation anxiety and will follow me around the house crying because he is afraid I will leave. Seriously I can't even go to the bathroom. He is a big cuddle bug and I love it. He also is shy around new people, but once he gets to know you, he doesn't want you to leave. He doesn't really understand what no means and we are working on him being soft with his cousins and the cats.
He really does love to eat, and enjoys all kinds of food and we he is done he will throw the left over food onto the ground. He is my little guy and weighs the same as Braden did at 9 months.

He is also my little dare devil, it is like he has no sense of fear. He climbs everything he can and then laughs at me when I come chasing after him. I swear the both of these boys will make me grey before I am 30. He has such a fun personality, and is a complete goofball to be around. He is bow-legged and it causes him to trip on his own feet a lot he is funny because once he falls he just sort of lays sprawled out on the ground for a little bit like he planned it. He will run and tackle you if you are on the ground, and he is always walking around with is arms spread wide open offering free hugs.

Until Next Time...

I am sure I left lots out, if you have any questions on how we are doing, or the boys are doing please message me or comment below and I will try my best to remember to respond back to you. Looking back at our year I know that it wouldn't have been so successful without the constant companionship of the Savior. I was thinking today in church where yes I cried again about how the Savior blesses my life. I often think of the Footprints in the Sand story and how the man looks back and only sees one set of footprints and the lord replies "My precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you." I know during my time of trial that the Lord has carried me, has held me and allowed me to cry and weep. He has wept with me, and been a comfort. I know many of you are praying for my family, and I. Please know the prayers are felt, and they are so desperately needed. Also know when you ask me how I am doing and I reply "I am okay." I am not okay, I am far from okay. I try to be okay, and through the Atonement of Christ I make it. I may not be okay, but I make it. I wouldn't make it if I did not have the Savior, or people loving and supporting me. I love you all and hope you have a great Christmas!

The most intimate thing I miss.

My husband has been deployed for almost 100 days, and not lived in our home since June. Today I am going to get intimate with you and discuss intimacy.

My good friend Google defines intimacy as so: in·ti·ma·cy
ˈin(t)əməsē/
noun
noun: intimacy
close familiarity or friendship; closeness.
"the intimacy between a husband and wife"
synonyms: closeness, togetherness, affinity, rapport, attachment, familiarity, friendliness, friendship, amity, affection, warmth, confidence; informalchumminess
"the sisters reestablished their old intimacy"
a private cozy atmosphere.
"the room had a peaceful sense of intimacy about it"
an intimate act, especially sexual intercourse.
synonyms: sexual relations, (sexual) intercourse, sex, lovemaking; More
an intimate remark.
plural noun: intimacies
"here she was sitting swapping intimacies with a stranger"
closeness of observation or knowledge of a subject.
"he acquired an intimacy with Swahili literature"

Let us get to it and discuss which definition of intimacy I miss the most and believe to play a vital role in a relationship at least my relationship with my husband. 
close familiarity or friendship; closeness.
"the intimacy between a husband and wife"
synonyms: closeness, togetherness, affinity, rapport, attachment, familiarity, friendliness, friendship, amity, affection, warmth, confidence

You thought I was going to talk about physical intimacy didn't you? Nope I want to talk about the togetherness of intimacy. The act of laying in bed with your head on his chest, his heart beating your name and yours beats his. All the world around you vanishes and for a moment you feel you are quite possibly in a different dimension. Euphoria flows through as you breathe in sync. Troubles are lost, peace vibrates through the room. It is a spiritual experience that you don't want to spend with anyone else. Because that person your head is laying on he is your person, he gets you, loves you every step of the way, he knows when to just hold you, he knows how to comfort you keep your head above water in the storms of bad days. He gently leads you to your rightful place by his side. You are his queen, he would do anything for you and you for him. He is rooted in the gospel of Christ he understands that he wants you there with him to be received by the Lord and all his glory. He is what you miss, his intimate companionship.

I truly hoped I conveyed my feelings in a way that is understandable. You don't have to be physically intimate to be in an intimate relationship. I honestly can live without physical intimacy, it is the emotional intimacy I miss most.

That one time in college I cried...in front of my classmates

As many of you know(which is no one because seriously who reads this) I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints "Mormon", I am also a college student. This term I took a class English 107 Intro to Early Literature. Our class included reading  the Hebrew Bible, The Ramayana(which I loved), Rumi, Sappho, Aristotle, Plato, The Tale of 1001 Nights (also loved), The Yang Poets(super loved), etc. It was all pretty ancient I mean thousands of years B.C. ancient. Like the first text ever written down kind of stuff. I say written down because oral stories have been around since the beginning.
Early on in our class my teacher let us know we would be given the opportunity to share a piece of literature with the class as a presentation. I jumped at the chance and thought what a great way to share The Book of Mormon. This class was a class based on fiction works, everything we read we read as if it were fictional. I knew going into my presentation that I was going to present the writings I felt to be true, as fictional if I chose to do my presentation on The Book of Mormon. The Book of Mormon is full of wonderful stories, and I wanted to share those stories even if it mean I was to share them as fiction.
I wrote my presentation proposal and got the go ahead from my teacher. She said as long as I understood my presentation would be to highlight the stories and that it would be considered as fictional it was okay. I understood what she wanted me to do and I began preparing. I was to give a brief history or summary of The Book of Mormon and choose one or two stories to share with the class. I didn't want my presentation to be too long so I narrowed it down to two stories and decided between the story of Enos, and the story of Ammon.

Day of my presentation

I was really nervous which is normal for me before a presentation. I went into class as prepared as I thought I could be. I began with my short history who, what where and when. This is Lehi he and his family left Jerusalem this is a record of the people in America. A showed one picture of Joseph Smith but asked told the class not to worry about him because he wasn't important he just translated the text later on. We were looking at the stories of the text which dates to before Christ. I decided to share Enos's story, and my favorite verses to highlight the way the text was written. We talked a little bit about Joseph Campbells ideas on Mythology and how we could draw connection from that with The Book of Mormon. I finished in the appropriate amount of time a short and sweet 10 minute presentation...but then

I asked Does Anyone Have Any Questions?

A hand shot up faster than one of Katniss's arrows. "I don't feel this an appropriate text for this class since Joseph Smith translated it in the 1800's. Also there is no proof of the Book of Mormon really existing. National Geographic doesn't even acknowledge it." (My teacher approved my proposal so therefore she made it appropriate.) My heart jumped to my throat and I replied "There is actually recent documentation of bones found that correlate with happenings of The Book of Mormon, and there is the witnesses." 

Bam another arrow shot at me "There is proof that Joseph Smith forged the Book of Abraham in The Book of Mormon.--" 

I interrupt "The book of Abraham?" 

"Yeah the book of Abraham." 

"There is no book of Abraham in The Book of Mormon."(It is in the pearl of great price and we know he took someone else's words it is called the Joseph Smith translation)

Back and forth these two individuals fed off of one another and ripped into me about the authenticity of The Book of Mormon.(Remember when I said this was a fiction class, and I was presenting it as fiction...I don't think they remember that.)

Finally after about 45 minutes of a one-sided debate my teacher chimed in "I let Alex do this project. Why is it the Western Religious writings cause so much heat?"

The Part that got me

"I felt like SHE was PREACHING at me." 

 We then spent another 10 minutes discussing why people get so upset over western religious stories but can read the Ramayana and feel fine. Did you know that people out there believe what happened in the Ramayana really happened, just like I believe what happened in The Book of Mormon really happened. What is truth to one, is a fictional story to others. Who draws the line? Is it black and white or a blurry grey area. It is most definitely a blurry grey area. 

"I felt like SHE was PREACHING at me." 

That right there you guys is what got me. I no way intended to go up there and preach to them, I only wanted to share stories I grew up listening too. I think it hurt so bad because it felt like it was a jab at my character. I am not a preacher, I do not push my beliefs on anyone. I have friends, family, who are not members of the church who have left the church, and I am open minded I love them just the way they are. I know as a disciple of Christ it is not my place to judge, as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ I know I am supposed to help spread the gospel, and that for me has never been by preaching. It isn't me, it has never been me, and it probably won't ever be me. And then...

I cried

Not because they were ripping my religion apart in front of me, trying to make me doubt, no I cried like a baby in front of a group of 25 college students because someone felt I was preaching to them. I sobbed and said "I am not that person, and I never intended to come off as preaching." Through ugly breaths of tears I apologized and unable to speak through the tears I took my seat. I sat through the remainder of class with tears streaming down my face as I thought about my public humiliation. I so badly wanted to get up and run out of class but I remained sniffling in my seat for the next hour of class. Two more presentations were given (appropriately 10 minutes long)  and finally class was over, I escaped quickly out the door and never looked back. I walked to my car, got inside of it and for the upteenth time I cried again like a baby. 

Looking Back

I feel like there are several things I could have done differently. One being when asked about Joseph Smith I could have politely responded "You know my presentation is just on the stories of the people of The Book of Mormon, if you would like to discuss Joseph Smith I will gladly talk with you after class."(Boom situation averted! Yay everyone claps) But no I didn't do that. I could have gone with bloody Ammon(pun intended) instead of prayerful Enos. The guys would have loved all the arms and gore. I didn't though and there is nothing I can do to change that. All I know is that it was an experience I hope to never live through again, also I am grateful for it to. It has taught me a lot about myself, others, and society too.